What a way to start the weekend.  Sure, I was working on a Saturday.  But after coming across an article on The Perfect Man on msn, all felt right in the universe.  I have always joked that I married up.  Perhaps it’s the other way around!  Who knew that I posessed 23 of the 30 characteristics that women surveyed wanted?  Well, at least according to a poll performed by Austin Reed  (whatever that is – evidently some British fashion retailer)

Anne, you are one lucky girl! 

Here’s a full list of qualities the perfect man apparently possesses:

1. 6 feet tall  (6’2″ – I’m sure I get extra points for the added 2″)
2. Toned and athletic  (perhaps a half a point for the effort of trying hard to get there)
3. Brown eyes  (brown in the winter, hazel in the spring through fall – again, just a bonus for you ladies)
4. Short dark hair  (yes, it’s dark… and short, or should we say shaved – maybe not by choice)
5. Smart dress sense  (since I am not even sure what this means, I believe I have failed on this one)
6. Beer drinker  (beer, wine, liquor – you name it, as long as it’s wet)
7. Non-smoker  (an occasional cigar – but the smell of cigarettes make me sick)
8. Wears smart jeans, shirt and a V-neck jumper  (what’s a v-neck jumper, and smart jeans? – I guess I’m dumb for not knowing)
9. Gets ready in 17 minutes  (7 minutes or 17 – just depends on how many times I hit snooze)
10. Stylish  (do jeans with holes and t-shirts count? – ok, an epic fail on this)
11. Wants a family  (what’s up Matty)
12. Earns £48,000 ($77,000) a year  (Sugar Daddy)
13. Loves shopping  (perhaps I’d rather cut off a finger instead – big miss on this one)
14. Eats meat  (mmm, did you say steak)
15. Clean shaven  (may depend on that darn snooze button again – but no beard or goatee here)
16. Smooth chest  (by smooth, you mean not hairy like a monkey? … ok, this isnt going to happen)
17. Watches soaps  (The Real Houswives of Orange County has to count for this)
18. Enjoys watching football  (bonus points for watching 3 games at a time in the man cave? – since this is British – perhaps by football, they really mean soccer – either way, winner winner chicken dinner)
19. Drives an Audi (actually a BMW – but its a luxury German car – same difference right?)
20. Educated to degree level  (thank you Happy Highlanders of Radford University)
21. Earns more than his other half  (OOPS – Thank you Dr. Lesburg)
22. Jokes around and has a laugh  (I hate jokes)
23. Sensitive when his wife/girlfriend is upset  (again, bonus points are due for being more sensitive than my wife)
24. Says ‘I love you’ only when he means it  (and only ever to one woman, besides my Mommy)
25. Admits it when he looks at other women  (pretty regular occurance – woman are beautiful and deserved to be looked at… there is that sensitivity again)
26. Has a driver’s license  (really, this is important to women?  maybe if you are 16 and don’t want your parents running you around… or you are 80, and you need a man to drive you around at night – evidently it’s a big bonus for the senior citizen market)
27. Can swim  (I once swam 4 miles for charity – so I can swim and be sensitive at the same time)
28. Can ride a bike  (just in case I ever lose that license, I’ll have a way to get around)
29. Can change a tire  (yes, but that’s about all I can do when it comes to fixing cars)
30. Calls mom regularly  (what exactly is regularly?  and is it regularly to my Mom, or regularly to me?)

So the way I see it, if I ever show up on the tv show How Do I Look?, I can ramp up to nailing 3 more off this list (5,8 & 10 – and who knows, maybe they can even talk me into #16).  And when I finish the journey, I will have knocked off #2.  And when I finally finish med school… ok, ok, let’s just face the facts that 13 and 21 are just not going to happen.  Maybe one day I will out earn a doctor… but I know I will never love to shop.